What's in it?

Someone up there really loves me. Whenever i find things to bitch about, He always hands me things that make me crack up.
We're on our 14th month. Hahaha, take that! (pat on the back) Who knew i could stand being monogamous for the longest time ever? I am such a good girl. And we celebrated it by having dinner at Jay-J's. Naturally, we had chicken inasal. I'm craving for fish, hence that sinigang na bangus belly. And i absolutely love talongs lately (hahaha, that does sound naughty) --- ok , eggplants, so we had it with bagoong. There was something off with the food, coz i can't help but scratch every inch of my arms, plus i kept on touching my face, which i DO NOT do. Midway through the meal, i finally put my finger on it. "Beb, may gata ba sa bagoong nila? Waahh allergic ako sa lahat ng malansa na may gata! (hahaha, what's wrong with me this morning?)" Thank heavens, they gave out complimentary turons, its arterial-clogging goodness saved me. Masarap ang turon ni Jay-j (somebody stop me already). Lesson learned: Know what you're eating. You're not 6 anymore. Even fear factor contestants know what they're getting into. Stupidity can manifest in the form of rashes.

Uncool me.

Been having sleepless nights lately, so while i was channel surfing to put myself to sleep, i caught Oprah's interview with Robert Downey,Jr. For a talented actor who wasted his time on drugs, one can't help but like him. He's one very charismatic person. Even middle age suits him well. Needless to say, i didn't sleep for the rest of the interview. He owned up to his mistakes, and he's trying to make amends with everybody he hurt along the way. I was deeply involved. Maybe he hit a nerve when he shared that for all those times he was high, all he wanted was to be cool. Now, he realizes he's not cool. And he's ok with it. Heard that! I've been dealing with an issue for a very long time. Who knew it would take a has-been actor to knock some sense into me. Suddenly, all those things that bothered me much before has less effect on me now. Cried over it a million times, but as babyface's song goes, nobody knew it but me. Of course, it would take time for me to finally own up to that problem, but i'll get there. Heck, it took Downey 30 years to face the truth. It still hurts me sometimes, but i take that in stride, at least i know i still care enough to feel pain. But never will i dwell on things that i am obviously not a part of, nor will i push myself to make me a part of something im not meant to be in. Now, if only i could be less vague... :)

Disappointed is a lover's word.

Since we've been under a movie drought lately, beb and i went to powerplant to watch a movie. He wanted to watch Guess Who? (Ashton Kutcher's movie) while i wanted to see Finding Neverland (Johnny Depp's). We compromised and settled with Sean Penn and Nicole Kidman's movie ---the Interpreter. Turns out to be one great choice, a very intelligent movie. I always thought it was so cool to be a linguist, and nicole kidman nailed the part down to the stress in her tone. She was so believable. Makes me wanna speak another language --- but i digress. Anyways, it was one of those movies that you wanted to watch again and go, "Ahhh yun pala yun". It deals with politics, ethnic cleansing, and a little hint of romance. I even thought that makes one more movie genre, you have romantic comedy and now romantic thriller. And it has one of the most memorable lines i've heard of in a movie. Memorable coz i so can relate. When Keller (Sean Penn) said to Sylvia (Nicole Kidman) "Disappointed is a lover's word.", beb and i started laughing, to the bewilderment of the couple seated next to us. Beb is so used to me saying that word that he practically throws it out before i do. Beb: I know your not mad at me, you're just disappointed --- which, more often that not, is true. But he always makes up for it, big time. Basta the movie's great, so glad we caught it, besides i am no Ashton Kutcher fan.

worth the 150 bucks...04.25

Post script: Tokyo-tokyo no longer serves pork misono. Bummer!
And yeah, beb got into an accident, again. Be careful beb, always.

hi i'm lallie, and im a bag-aholic

i am one textbook case of impulsive shopping. case in point: beb and i went to market market yesterday to check out trellis there in the hunt for sisig. and since we are on the biggest aircon tianggian ---and i couldn't resist--- we decided to check out the goods. now, me being in the i wanna buy everything i see moment, set in mind that i just need blouses because i always end up screaming i have nothing to wear. Actually, beb and i had a minor spat while walking the mall, that i'm suddenly out of my shopping mood. Guess what took me out of my topak? Bags! I am such a bag addict. I have a wall of bags and i'm starting to run out of hooks to hang my latest buys, it's crazy. Ha, and since i blew my budget on these bags, i had to borrow some moolah from beb to buy the blouse i should have bought before i headed towards the bag shop. I have no shopping will power. I know it's so pathetic. But heck, it makes me happy so i'm giving in...

i need another wall


now, where do i hang these ?

from an old friend to another.

finally did it. i have been meaning to message an old friend but didn't come around actually doing it because i was the biggest chicken in the world, but i finally did it.

here's how it goes...

i should have done this a long time ago, but i think i owe it to myself to do this now, baka mag chicken out na naman ako. miss na kita. alam mo ba this past few weeks (or was it months) may family has been seeing you around? one time sa makro, then a few days ago sa may malabon citisquare (hahaha i know it sounds stalker-ish) tapos they kept saying, leng di ba may friend ka, yung madalas pumunta dati sa bahay, yung maganda (pretty vague, pero i knew it was you) too bad it wasn't actually me who saw you, then i wouldn't be typing away here. my point is, i always thought i don't need a bestfriend, that my life was happy enough to have many good friends around me, pero it was nice when i shared everything with a person before, and you were the closest friend i had ever, heck, i think we refer to each other as bestfriends then. sorry if i sound weird, no im not asking you to be my bestfriend, we lost a lot of time, but it would be nice to be friends with you again (not just friendster friends, i think we don't need another one of those) if you still live there, am just 5 minutes away (nga pala we moved, actually thrice, and the first time i was a minute walk away from ur house, crazy noh?) or just text me if you want 0917813XXXX, or just msg me here, ur call, and yeah no pressure. if you think im five years too late, i understand... just really wanted to do this.

miss you (i mean it)

that's it. i've sent it. out of my hands. i'll go cry now...

Ocean on my head.

With nothing else to do after dinner, beb and i decided to oblige to Xtf's invites to a party at the CCP area. Heck, i owe this girl --- actually the whole ds tropa --- a lot since i've been skipping all those lunch and dinner outs with them because of work (can you say loser?) We decided to let es-em and mark tag-along, the more the merrier as they say. Turns out it was an LSFM party and a lot of people came. We almost didn't go, coz beb had an issue on where to park and was ready to bolt out of the place, so i tried to just meet up with Xtf so the trip wasn't completely wasted. Met with her inside, said my hi's and apologized since we can't come inside. But being xtf, she talked us into going in, her friend Gary --- a great hostess --- was going to give us free tickets and we can skip the line (woohoo! i hate lines). So went back to the van and convinced my company and next thing we knew we were inside, bobbing our head to great music. Then, Gary gave us crazy party hats which are way cute to sport around hehehe. It also didn't harm beb when he saw a stand selling grape juice spiked with GSM blue, so everybody was happy. To cap the night off, the whole group, us with Xtf, along with Diday and Mari (her sisters), Miam, Gary and a couple more people jumped on a yacht on a trip to see manila bay's coastline. Way fun to do something new, finally!

me, beb and GSM blue ...04.24

xtf and me with the ocean on our heads...04.24

my sister es-em and tipsy mark ...04.24

Lala.

today, my family marks my lola's 10th year death anniversary. we had mass and have dinner at my aunt's place like we do every year. And eventhough a decade has gone by, i still remember the day my lola died like it was yesterday...
lola's house was empty at that time. lola was in tagaytay with her "barkada". she decided to cool her head off there since she was still disappointed of my aunt who went to the states for vacation against her wishes. and since nobody was staying in my aunt's room at that time (i think it was a day before at that time since she left for us), me and my cousins decided it would be fun to have some sort of slumber party in her room (we were always welcome anyways). The morning broke and the phone was incessantly ringing, but since there were maids in the house, we left it up to them to answer the line. A few moments later, we heard wailing downstairs. This was wailing, not just crying, but wailing. We rushed downstairs, me, my ate minnie, ericson, ate ging, and ate michelle. Then we saw her there, my lola, who at that time seems just on a state of deep sleep, while my relatives start pouring and filling up the sala where her body was situated. Her yaya told us that my lola became sick sometime that early morning because of all the food she took the day before and they immediately tried to rush her to manila, but on the way, she heard a vein pop and lola just layed in her arms. My family at that time was already making preparations for her interment, making sure all the papers were in order when they realized my aunt was still on the plane. They decided to call my aunt's friends who went along with her. Her friends informed my aunt that they had to go back immediately because some emergency has happened with their family. My aunt, completely gracious, was willing to fly back with them, but sensed that the excuse wasn't completely true. She kept on asking what the emergency was, but as her company ignored every question, the worry she felt grew even more. It was only when she saw the black cloth hanging from our gate that her fears were confirmed. She couldn't bring herself to enter our compound, knowing lola died without her having to say she's sorry. She cried and cried at our parish church until she was ready to face my lola's remains. Up to this day, she still guilts herself out of what has happened.
lola was one strong character. She was bisaya with the most beautiful spanish mestiza features, she raised eight kids when my angkong passed away when my father was in his late teens. she welcomed my angkong's second family when they decided to move here from china, and treated his two other sons as his own. my family has a strong matriarchal hold which i truly think stems from her. She was always and forever the best cook in our family. everybody learned from her, my family, the helpers, the laborers, her friends. I got my name from her (Clara, Clarissa ; Lala, Lallie) and i hope she looks down one day and say i did her name proud.

caught the bug?

There's definitely something in the air. Some airborne virus is spreading around and a few of my friends are succumbing to the love bug. Not that i am complaining. I'm actually super ecstatic for them. It's about time, for crying out loud! Having educated in an all-girls school, i've grown up and fell in love with the most beautiful people (yeah, i love my friends). And when i went away for college (i was practically isolated in katipunan, except for techie who was on the other side of the "friendship bridge"), i was again surrounded by equally pretty girls for friends. And it puzzles me for a time because most of them weren't already snatched up for the gorgeous ladies that they are. Here i was in the company of the nicest, most intelligent women in this side of manila, and i wonder why guys aren't lining up for them. We may be busy, and weren't exactly into the social scene, but heck, somebody great ought to find this girls or the guys won't know what they're missing. Well, i guess everybody has a match and matches "sizzles" up in time, so i guess the summer of 2005 packs up the heat. I am feeling giddy all morning , knowing some of my friends feel the same way. Me so happy!

freefalling

it's my second time to change url, the first was out of vanity. I was going for cute and meaningful after realizing there are sickos out there and posting my whole freaking name isn't such a good idea after all. However, this time hurts coz i had to change it out of necessity. my last url is, pardon my french, fucked up. it won't freakin' publish properly. I keep ending up with my post a week ago and my new posts aren't shown. The tag-board is screwed up as well (not blogger's fault) and had been down several times already so maybe i should be looking for a new (free) provider. being the major tamad that i am, i was content of having my last url for the blog and wasn't really planning to change it. It really sucks, big time! But i have to make do, and i think this url suits my present disposition better than my last. Blessing in disguise? Maybe. But please, let this be the last url fiasco.

car show, smarshow.

what is the common denominator between cars and girls? Awww, right they attract the same specie.
Since beb always gladly obliges to my every whim on where to go, what to do or where to eat, i figured it would be nice of me to go with him to what our male counterparts consider what to us is a midnight madness sale, a transport show. We went to mega trade hall and arrived at a seemingly endless array of modified cars, booth after booth of audio and video systems, tires and car air fresheners. Ohhh, and goddesses were scattered around the halls handing out flyers and leaflets and brochures of whoever hired them to hang around and spread pheromones to entice the lurkers--- eh, car enthusiasts abound. Noticeably, there were only a few (normal) girls dropping by this event, and the few of us who stray obviously have their significant others dragging them by the wrist. haaayy, the things i do for love...

Falling without wings.

since beb is practically a part of my family and he's already used to me dragging his healthy behind around my family affairs, i think it's only proper if i come to one of his, being fair and all. so dressed in my most kagalang-galang newly-bought ensemble, i went with him and his siblings to tagaytay highlands to celebrate with his family on their grandparents' 56th (i think) wedding anniversary. it was lunch at China palace then an afternoon of the young at heart lounging around having adult conversations while the younger ones dipped in the pool. the place is admittedly beautiful, but i'm not blown away. honestly, i'm still wondering what is with all the hype about the highlands. maybe, i'm just more of a sea and sand person now rather than being fond of hills and mountainsides. Or maybe because i get more psychotic around places where i could "fall" to my death. No, i don't have a fear of heights, rather i am "drawn" to edges in places of high altitude. Somehow, when i am on top of mountains, along those familiar zigzagged roads, i always find myself wondering what if i jumped out of the car and run to the side of the mountains and "just fall", or whenever im in tall buildings looking down from somewhere on the high floors, it tickles my mind to think of just having a "free fall". I am not a suicide case waiting to happen, and though the thought of simply falling crosses my mind, i am sane enough not to heed the call, to the relief of my ex-flatmates in Loyola Height Condo (i miss my girls, we should have dinner sometime soon). haay anyways, here's some wonderful view of the affluents' playground tucked in the mountains of tagaytay and my love affair with vanilla ice cream.

sunny paths ahead...04.10

landscapes at the highlands...04.10

yummy... 04.10

turning 18...one less reason to be pasaway.

my cousin will turn legal tomorrow, so my aunt threw her a party and since space is very ample in our new compound, mama gladly offered to host the shindig here. it was a very modest party with guests arriving endlessly, seems to me that my cousin happens to be a little popular in her circles. auntie hired a mobile system, though these kids would rather drink "sunog-baga" style rather than shake what their momma's gave them (harharhar, that song always reminds me of beb). She and her friends prepared a very looooong program, typical of debuts nowadays. It's not enough to have your usual 18 roses and 18 candles in coming out parties lately. Now there's 18 wines, 18 treasures and 18 what-have-yous. Of course, you don't want to offend your friends when 36 slots aren't enough to accomodate them to be part of your so-called celebration of womanhood. As for my part (which i thought i don't have any) i was one of her 18 candles. Imagine my shock when here i was dressed in a semi-decent top and jeans. (but it was all in the attitude, so wa-ker!). I gave the generic wish you all the best, then adding never to give her parents heartache, which gave me a whoop-whoop from my auntie hehehe. after my little participation , i changed into my pj's and slept my way thru the rest of the night, whether there's was music blaring through my walls or not. Caught one cute pic though... tatay, my grandfather in my mother's side (both my grandparents from my father's side passed away already, he's my only grandparent left) with his two apo sa tuhod. Ahhhh, generations....

tutay, tatay and ouie...04.08

beb, make a wish...

for the past year and a half, a certain someone has been treating me extra special. my personal "comforter" in every sense of the word, jose raul peralejo, jr., celebrates his 23rd year of existence. so what am i to do but to, for lack of a better word, mag-effort. so as promised, i went to makati to have lunch with him and and to hang in his school with the boys. well, more of lunching than hanging. Thanks to that lil wonderful cake store in enterprise, got him some cake he wanted and made him feel it was really his birthday by blowing out some candles. and i thought all this time, only girls like cake. you should've seen da boyz down some serious cakes faster than we can sing "happy birthday". beb still has classes to attend to (poor little schoolboy), so i just busied myself in powerbooks at greenbelt for a couple of hours for the dinner with the folks. I picked up some chick lit since im not really in the mood for deep thinking at that time. Got one about a second assistant in Hollywood --- thick, nonsense and totally unrelatable--- so it was perfect. Two hours went by like a breeze and the next thing i knew my phone's ringing with beb on caller id. Met up with him, then Jamie at seattle's. His dad, kuya jp and jake arrived only moments after us and we went to bubba gump for some dinner though we still have to wait his mom who's on her way coming the airport from Davao. When everybody's settled, we just had this great tummy filling dinner i was grateful i took part of. Incidentally, it was one of those rare moments that beb's dad wasn't so wide eyed seeing me in their presence. Beb and i started to have this running joke that his father's somehow mistakes me for a ghost, if that is the only way to explain his "shocked" look everytime he sees me. Guess it takes time to get used to this scenario. As for me, it will take me a forever. But anything for my beb, anything. Happy birthday, my special man...

growing up is hard to do (?)

The one weekend we thought we were free to spend in puerto galera wasn't so free after all. Actually, to be honest about it, we knew about KC's 1st bday party in Jollibee three days before the trip, but since everybody was set on going and it was the only time we can squeeze in a couple of days of sunworshipping, we decided to just jump onboard and suffer the consequences of a mother's wrath. Nah, Cheche, the celebrant's mother and the nicest and sweetest person in our bunch (walang aapila) couldn't hurt a fly, and that made the speaker phone call much more dreadful since we know it was one of those "nakakatampo" moments. But we made do with a promise to see the kada's boylet the first moment Jose's spirit leaves our bodies (we wouldn't wanna introduce the man to the boy, at least, not yet --- joke mommy cheche). However, words got mixed up and we ended up not seeing the birthday boy on tuesday, kc still being with his daddy's family. Anyhow, the night just became one of those nights when we get updated with what going on with everybody's lives. There is mommy che with daddy ferdie, trinz who had visual proof that she was the only tropa in the party, deb who was fresh from cagayan with jek (who was packing it, yihaa), and the guilty bunch, me, techie, just, and maebz. Haay, when girls start turning into women... when highschool talk of basketball and quizzes and irritating teachers turns into yuppie chat of job descriptions, kids and nosy shrek-like (techie with her vomit inducing officemate) coworkers, but considering we had gone gaga over jollibee give-aways assured me growing up would still be fun if we hang around with each other.

JP II, we love you.

I woke up in paradise to a world mourning over one great loss. I saw you when you came here for 1995's World Youth day. You had the reddest cheeks i've ever seen, and you glowed in a way a 12 year old would gaze over but wouldn't understand.To the only pope our generation knew, grew up to and loved, you will be missed. What big shoes to fill.

one tough act to follow
(picture lifted here)

Awasan sa PG.

After several months of getting our feet wet in the working scene, me and a handful of my girlfriends started longing for an escape from the seemingly monotonous lifestyle we are being dragged into kicking and screaming. So what better way to take a very deserving break from reality and ushering in the official summer season of 2005 than a trip to the beach?!? So sheryl, just, tessa, maebz and me packed the snuggest and shortest of our belongings and headed off at three in the morning at the 2nd of april for a couple of days of rest and relaxation to batangas port, a boat ride away from the paradise we lovingly refer to as PG (puerto galera, if i left you clueless). Can sum up our trip in three words: Booze and Snooze. No escapade can be complete without the gang, and at this particular one, three made the cut. Of course, Jose was a given, but this time he brought along his girlfriend Marge... ok let's call it a threesome, since Homer is in the mix, although unfortunately, we hadn't gotten around him (too bad). After catching some rays in the morning (which toasted just to a nice scarlet color hehehe), a few zzz's at noon, the session with the gang started by sunset at the beach. It wasn't romantic by a mile, but who needs romance when you got alcohol-induced warmth at hand. Scores of kodak moments followed, throw in some template smiles caused by Jose's magic, and you got yourself some cool pictures, few of which we didn't remember taking, however because i am sworn to confidentiality, subject pictures are immediately deleted (hahaha). By this time, the beds in our room started to look like heaven, so what should be just a few minutes of lying around waiting for six feet under turned out to be another sleeping marathon. By midnight, the night-owls of pg came alive and we weren't going to miss it. There was pizza, and mango shakes (necessary because we can still feel Jose rushing thru our veins) and a number of couples bashing here and there (one in particular had a long lover's spat moment near our territory) and we called it a night (well, early morning). We woke up to a not so unexpected news, though still heartwrenching, but we manage to still drench ourselves both of sun and sea knowing reality will bite us in the ass by sundown. While our designated narcoleptic tried to sleep it off in the sand, attempting to even up her confused tan lines demarkated the day before, the waves were picking up as the rest of us were in the waters, which proved to be quite an adventurous ride back to mainland luzon. Thank heavens the ride home was smooth and almost traffic free and we made it safely to malate church's final mass. Yes, we have a lot to be thankful for. Sarap talaga mag-awas!

tessa, sheryl, just, maebz, lallie
galera girls... nag-aawas 04.02

sunworshippers 04.02